Don't Be Like Me

This is a good definition, but it's only one way to look at it. I would like to challenge this and offer a different perspective.

I have been fortunate over the course of my career to have many people who I considered as a mentor, and they were wonderful people who completely fit the traditional definition. In most cases, it wasn’t someone I met with regularly. I would often, and still do, seek them out at a networking event or for a few minutes after a board meeting, hungry for whatever tidbit of wisdom they could impart on me that day. Much of the learnings I retain now are from these amazing mentors who took the time to care about my success.

When we broaden the definition of the word “mentor”, and allow ourselves to be open to the notion that our guides in our careers can come from any direction and be of any age, we become better because of it. We are successful in life and our careers when we are open to learning. Always. Every single day.

I continue to be open to learning and try to absorb every single day. Some of my most impactful mentors have taught me the importance of being honest and vulnerable in business. They’ve taught me that it is OK to know what you don’t know. You don’t always have to be the smartest person in the room. Rather, it is important to surround yourself with people smarter than you. 

During the presentation, we were asked a fairly easy question by the client and I jumped in without pausing to consider who was the right person to articulate the answer. I was definitely not the right person. In that moment, and maybe in my enthusiasm, I forgot every lesson I’ve learned. My colleague, who actually knew the answer because he did the work, was sitting right there. In the room. Across the table from me. In plain sight. I could have deferred to him immediately. But nope. I didn’t. I spun my way around in circles so many times that I made everyone dizzy, and not from my dazzling intellect. To make matters worse, I think I angered the client a little. 

And here’s the kicker, which I’m sure you’ve already guessed….my colleague is younger and less experienced (read: way younger) than me. What in the actual hell was I thinking? I should have just nodded in his direction, and stepped way out of the way. 

Age has absolutely nothing to do with being the smartest person in the room. Neither does experience. And it has absolutely nothing to do with being a mentor. 

So what happened next? My colleague eventually rescued me by stepping in and providing a professional, articulate and correct answer to the question. 

The morale of the story? Mentors are people you allow yourself to learn from. Those who you are open to let them guide you. They aren’t necessarily old and gray and walking with a cane (not that there is anything wrong with that). Sometimes a mentor moment can come from the new kid across the table from you. 

He did a remarkable job and the client was more than satisfied with his answer. He was my mentor at that meeting, because I learned a lesson from him I will hopefully never forget.